Wednesday, June 29, 2022


 So many details.  So little time.  

I have a pretty good memory.  But, it sure helps to have a whiteboard.  

When I have a thought re my company, I mark it down.  It's a modest list.  I don't scribble all over.  

It's a to do list and concise reasons about my work.  

I try not to waste time, nor space.  

There are a few items such as call the dentist etc.

Mostly, it states reasons and goals.  

When I say 'my past is my future', I point to the board.  Use your time and the newest, loss galvanizes, stand out.

There is a corner portion concerning my quest for a house/home.  Get and keep.

Last but hardly least, it says 'of, by and for the Light'.  It's a ref to the Clan Sinclair motto 'Commit Thy Work To God'.


Tuesday, June 28, 2022


 The two sided coin.  

I'm proud of my kids.  They think for themselves and do the right thing.  

I'm proud to be an American.  We face life eye to eye.  Scared sometimes but we push through.  

The mirror is true too.  It comes before the fall.  Slow poison which breeds delusion is the reason some angels fell.  Thinking you're better than everyone else leaves a mind gap.  The emptiness creates an obsession.  Control satiates the hole, for a while.  

In Clinical Psych there is controlling due to lack of self.  That describes the darkside/collectivism to a 'T'.  

Now, I say there is self controlling due to having a firm sense of self.  

In the midst of chaos, we can remain focused.  We listen and are confident as well.  

Stand but be flexible

Sometimes when they try to knock you down, roll.

Monday, June 27, 2022


 I had the chance to wander around part of my old neighborhood recently.

A local bar has reopened.  It holds a lot of memories.  It was a neighborhood bar that encompassed locals and students.  It was a late night haven for other bar employees, a little r & r.

Now it's at the same place, yet different, a mixture of old and new.  

One can't go back.  One shouldn't.  We remember the good and bad.  There is no living in the past.  We bring our memories forward and I hope learn from them.  

I noticed a lot of 'old timers' showed up.  Everybody has stories to share.  I'll just leave those to personal memory lol.

Now kids and dogs can be on the patio during the day and early evening.  In olden times it was strictly adults right up to 3 in the morning.

Lotta comedy and drama in there.

I predict the bar will survive.  Its location is just right and near another decades old tavern.  Good neighbors.

As I wandered, I noticed most of the houses remained.  Many neighbors, now gone but the houses pass onto new folks.

The corner drugstores are long gone.  And a landmark grocery, one of a chain, finally closed a year and a half ago.  I'd've thought it might survive being a landmark, but no dice.  Needless to say smaller stores disappeared decades ago.  The malt shop is no more.  Even a comic book shop, though existant, moved out of the area.  

The oldest mall has become a string of stores, open air again.  Behind it, encroaching, is an apartment building  With a black and grey facade, I thought of Sing Sing.

Thgere are more apartments being built nearby.  It's a long way from where there was once a cornfield.

An increase in crime, robberies and some shooting has reared its ugly head.  

Back when, I walked to the stores.  I went to college nearby and frequently walked alone late at night.  Now it's a dangerous proposition.

The atmosphere has changed.  A lack of personality permeates the air.  Not unfriendly, just distant.  There is a growing lack of trust

I'm reminded one of the socalled 'elites' has said we will own nothing, live in box apartments and be happy.  Nope.  Not as long as enough of us stand up and maintain our humanity.  

Interestingly, I think the reopened bar and its older cousin will help.  They are not trouble spots.  Never were.  

I will kieep my head on a swivel and once in a while visit.

Stand up, speak out resist.

And toast the future.

Tuesday, May 31, 2022


 Imagine a substandard motel.

Broken furniture, moldy bathroom and poor air.

Imagine being required to pay up front.

Complaints are obstinately refuted.  All is well-not really.

Imagine a family nervously checking out and saying everything was fine.

Imagine not allowing the owner to get away with a swindle.  

Speaking up and declaring exposure if policy isn't reversed.

Refund and ensconced at a decent place.

But nothing changed.

The subpar remained.

Too many nervous 'don't make waves' people.

Not enough truth seekers.

The tide is turning.

Don't stop.

Monday, May 30, 2022

Excuse Vs Solution

 Having a collegiate background in Clinical Psych, I'm familiar with mental health terms.

They've changed over the years, some good some well, trendy.  In other words, it isn't always to manipulate.  It can be honest attempts to better describe a condition.  Instead of 'oh well, that's just the way it is', we have possessed methods of understanding.

If someone has a particular condition, one might live with it and either improve or settle into the sediment.  How a ticker works can lead to keep it just ticking or tick better -s-.

Learn about yourself.  Don't be afraid.  Be honest and consult with open people who seek enlightenment.  

Some of what goes on is 'birds of a feather' as in misery loves company.  Or it serves those who wish to control others.

Seek those birds who also seek folks who want/need answers.

Controlling due to lack of self vs self control/enlightenment.

Sunday, May 29, 2022



Win some, lose some.

Losing nearly an entire book collection is galvanizing.  And a choice.

Either one just stops and sits in the middle of the mess crying woe is me OR one stands up and starts rebuilding.  Tough?  Well gee, things can be tougher.

And the info/data in those books resides in the head.

The secrets of the ancients are within, they say.  Accumulated knowledge is elsewhere but starts inside.  What do you do with it?  Depends on what it is.

Re-membering.  Putting pieces together.  Retrieval.

There is nothing here.  Or something.

Don't mismatch.  No arms for legs.

Saturday, May 28, 2022

Loss Redux

 Our losses are personal.

Forgive the captain obvious remark.

Each of us suffers in our own way.

Loss over the decades, even the millennia, are incalcuable.  

Most of us, for instance, have not had everything taken and finally Freedom, then herded into cattle cars and exterminated.

Many of us came to America with little and next to nothing.  Then we made our way up and out.  

Many of us, born here, have a loss of perspective re Freedom and possessions.

It must be taught to appreciate both.

My greatest loss was family, friends and associates.  Yet, they are with me still and in a way that they can never go nor be taken away.

Once at a point with only the clothes on one's back and no roof over one's head to amassing things.  Remember they are indeed just things.

Then, taken away partially.

Sitting in a room with most of those remaining things in back and to the side, it streamlines 'things'.  

One takes what is inside, memory, learning, love and all and rebuilds.

Use what is available and never forget.

Freedom, not tyranny motivates just as love and not hate grows.