Monday, November 23, 2009

Humunculi

A curious subspecies of human. Some even debate whether they ARE human.

They have been seen in both urban and countryside galumphing about in their odd clumsy style.

They are usually loners (thank the great Maker), but have been known to pair up and even collect in small groups.

If one is downwind, one can be warned they are coming by their typical unwashed sour odor. It resembles something between a privy in summer and an unclean stale locker room.

The effeminate cry, moan, whimpering of the humunculi is not fearful. It is dreaded because it foreshadows the bitching that characterizes their lot in life. Excuses are easier than facts.

They often steal the nests of humans and build a cluttered mess that seems to serve some kind of protective barrier. They have been known to sh*t where they eat.

They are remarkably single minded to the exclusion of other pursuits and latch on to a vague sense of security and false assumption they are somehow brighter than most other humans that they imitate.

There is a frightening lack of leadership skills, thus the usual loner lifestyle.

Notorious cowards, they often let others do their fighting for them and that frequently after they have baited someone.

When seeking companionship, they often step on their own d*cks and see what they want and not the reality of a situation. In other words, they live in phantasmigoria.

They amount to little and if they reproduce, thankfully rarely, their offspring resemble clones more than actual progeny.

There are exceptions to the rule both ways indicating there might be something to the 'born that way' theory. For humunculi have sired decent honest people just as good people have fathered humunculi.

In short, these curiosities often ascend to the least common denominator, but interestingly can achieve lasting mediocrity in liberal circles and of course thrive on the ignorance and indulgence of such.

They are NOT to be confused with humunculus frankus/dickus, a distinct subsubspecies that exhibits a modicum of success but at the price of decent humans everywhere.

If encountered, never EVER turn your back on one.

I believe they are mistaken for one another not by the whiny voice so much as the illusion of self importance they exhibit, due to coddling and no boundaries set.

Avoid them but watch them and warn them too, because they are a danger to all.

6 comments:

tipper said...

They are self doomed since they cannot pour p*ss out of a boot.

Mike H said...

don't underestimate some of them tipper.
some as suggested have gotten into certain positions of 'power'.

Are you THE tipper? If so, your hubby is a real humunculi helper.

teacher said...

It sits even now, tapping keys with fat greasy fingers, addicted to porn.............

A self satisfied smirk and burp as it proclaims itself master of gamers.........

Mike H said...

You have one around too eh teacher?

teacher said...

Most people have that embarrassing family member that they would wish did not exist.

Mike H said...

Some have whole families -s-.